Hello everyone! I got the following email from one Naturally Leslie reader who wanted to share her perspective on natural hair for boys. It hit home with me because, as I already shared a short while back, I am expecting a little boy myself! I appreciated reading her piece and was glad to share it with all of you.
by Monica- Hair & Heart
There are a ton of blogs and youtube channels devoted to girls and their curls. How to style them, dress them up, keep them healthy etc. There is almost no information online devoted to young boys with highly textured hair. What about those of us with little princes who don’t want to chuck up the deuces to that beautiful hair and “just get a fade”? Its not often you see a young boy with long hair and if you do they probably have that “good grade” of hair (as my grandmother calls it). Every now and then I may see a prince with locs or cornrows but almost never free flowing a la Jaden Smith. Its frowned upon to have your son rock his curls after learning how to talk, as the old wives tale goes.
My son, Kai, is 2 ½ and I decided that I am not going to cut his hair (again…this will be explained later) to conform to the norms of African American society. My son has a beautiful head of hair. His curls have tightened up a bit since he was born, but they are still gorgeous. He has always been mistaken for a girl since he was born as well. Even while wearing a blue outfit, with airplanes and tiny chuck taylors. I began to think that maybe it was his hair, which I used to keep in box braids. I began to see that most people think that having long hair was more of a feminine aesthetic. My thoughts were confirmed by my BF’s mother when she stressed that he really should get his hair cut. Her reasons were that “he needs to feel like a boy” *side eye on deck*. After much thought, I lopped off a few of his braids. I gave in ya’ll, I cut my baby’s hair . We took him to the barber to complete the job I started and he cut Kai’s hair to this <> long. It was literally 1 ½” long and lop sided. The “barber” cut his hair with industrial scissors so I had to go back and cut even more to get rid of any split ends that may have emerged from the butchering of his tiny head.
I cried….and cried….and cried. For a week straight. I don’t know if it was because his hair was gone or the fact that I gave into pressure and did something I didn’t want to do in the first place. After that I vowed to never cut his hair again. That was about 8 months ago. His hair is almost as long as it was pre-cut. I started my own blog that focused on natural hair kids especially boys to help other mothers in this predicament. What to do with their hair to not appear girly? Does long hair really equal feminine? Doesn’t boy hair require just as much care and attention as a girl’s does? All these questions have been on my mind. His journey is just beginning but I do not want him to feel like he has to look a certain way to fit into the “boy” mold, especially when it comes to his hair.
To see more from Monica (including some ridiculously adorable pics of her little guy Kai, check out her blog here.
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