Ridiculous idiots

Gawd help me!

In the absence of my blogging I have lost all my smart and older readers and have attracted a new bunch of mindless teenagers!!!!!

Sometimes I wonder if I look like one of them or something, how come they indulge me in their childish bullshit? They say things like "You look like a hooker from Changi", expecting me break down and cry, thinking, wooh, double attack, I look like a hooker and also a tranny!

It's very funny, I mean, I am only 22, but still a far cry from 16 year olds who will get affected by immature sentences like that, yeah?

You wouldn't go up to an old man, being all 13 or something, and say, "Youu r v ugliie N fAt!!!", expecting him to be affected by it, yeah? What makes you all think I will be?

The old man will just laugh at the naivety of youth.

I also find that the comments are mostly written by idiots, because once someone says something vaguely funny, everyone follows and writes the exact same thing, rendering it totally not funny anymore.

Funniest thing: There are people who wrote that I should not have put up a self-indulgent photo of myself during a 9/11 anniversary!

Should blog about melancholy and sad things! Should be more sensitive, considerate!

MUAHAHHA!

That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard for years!

Why don't you check a history calender before being happy every day? Every fucking day of the year we are in a war anniversary, considering how long wars can last - so how, every day cannot be happy is it? MUST MOURN AH?

Oooh Christmas countdown - TSUNAMI ANNIVERSARY! Even more people died! CANNOT COUNTDOWN!

Siao gin nas.

I'd tell you what I did on 9/11: I went to Weili's birthday party, coz his birthday is 9/11! I drunk and ate and sang and was basically very happy when 5 years ago many people died!

WHO CARES, IT'S OVER, AND NONE OF THEM ARE EVEN VAGUELY RELATED TO ME. I'm not even American *roll eyes*. (Until my baby marries me! You know you want to darling...)

The Steve Irwin thing pisses me off too.

Before he died, nobody gave a fuck about him. Before he died, possibly no one knew he did charity and saved animals and what the fuck else he did.

Everyone only knew he wrestled with crocodiles and possibly had the thought "Man, this person doesn't seem to treasure life very much" pass through their heads before.

But woah, die already, then must act like you are love him so much and he is your idol is it? Bloody hypocrites.

Thanks for telling me why the MSN tortoise and that he has a zoo. Thanks but no thanks, because I DON'T CARE. I care less now that he is dead. He was great, he was nice to animals and whatever. GOOD FOR HIM AND THE ANIMALS. But not even vaguely related to my life.

Why do you care? Is it because he was the buzz, and therefore you wanted to be in the buzz too, acting all passionate when all you know about him consisted of you watching about 1/2 an hour of his show your whole life? Don't you think it's worse to be taking advantage of his death than to not care about it?

Fuck off and die people.

Bloody tweens.

Stop reading my blog and saying thing like "You look so slutty" and asking if I had sex with Mike before... Are you like 12 or something? I'm bloody a decade older man, and if I choose to look bombshellish, then I will surely look slutty (although I call that sexy... hahaha), and that's fine too, because adults have sex, that's what they do.

At least the good looking ones, I would never know about the uglies.

Cloudy is an animal, but even he doesn't seem very
affected that a great animal lover just died.

Yeah yeah his face is dirty. Whatever, pretentious animal lovers. This picture is way long ago, now he is all shaved.

Bombshell!

Or at least trying to photoshop myself to be. :D

Hmmm, think Mike will like this picture.

Quote of the day:

- Zapzap, on seeing Denise Keller on MTV -

Me: Wah her mouth very big.
Zap: Yes can put two ku ku bird inside.

Nonsense

I realised how old I am, when Smelly, who is 13, told me that on HIS msn list everyone had changed their nicks to include a tortoise icon for the death of Steve Irwin.



I suppose the tortoise is the closest you can get to a crocodile, the second closest being the snail , which is not close at all.

At least the tortoise kinda lives in water.

But yes, on my msn list, only about 4 people had the icon. FOUR!

I suppose if you ask any one of my old 22 year old friends why they didn't put the icon, they will give you some old people answer, like "You think I so free ah, NO NEED TO PAY THE BILLS IS IT?!"

When you meekly reply, "But putting the tortoise is nothing to do with the bills..."

they holler at you and say, "Yeah yeah only you damn free lar you don't need to work, only blog whole day!"

Just to prove their point, they put as their msn nicks "Fuck Steve Erwin and tortoises no need to pay bills is it"... Even the misspelling symbolises their oldness coz they are so jaded, they can't be bothered to remember people's names anymore.

I think it's mean, but I had to stifle a laugh when I heard how he died. I mean, of all methods to pass away! Very suay lar. Stingrays always seem so harmless and delicious with sambal sauce... until we forget why they are called STINGrays.

Anyway, I am gonna go to Zapzap's place now for steamboat!

Qihua called and went like, "This thursday ok, come for steamboat... After that, mahjong until like, I dunno, forever! hahaha..."

I was sleeping, but 'mahjong forever' just put a smile on my face.

"Ok... =)" I said.

p/s: Momo said that Po Po (Momo's mom) was a mahjong addict and also very good at it (Po Po died before I was born). Now Po Po had like 9 children or something, and nobody was very interested in MJ except my eldest auntie, and she is very good at it too and plays EVERYDAY!

Now apparently for the next generation of kids, no one else seems to be very interested in MJ too, so I am the one inheriting Po Po's MJ legacy! So please lar dead Po Po, bless me win big big today, Auntie Percy already win thousands in her years of playing, now my turn lar Po Po...

p/p/s: Watch this link, super funny can... Rozz sent to me.

I shall be nicer!

I think I am a very unlikeable kinda person because I am so bloody intolerant of everything.

I don't like people who are stupid, I don't like people with awkward social manners, I don't like people who like poetry or like to take nude photos obviously for voyeurism and attention but mask it off as art (which in itself gives me the vibe that because they can appreciate art and others can't, they are in one upper class), I don't like people who don't admit mistakes, I don't like co-workers to work less and shittier than me and get paid the same pay (Not you Miss Lee, some other people), I don't like a lot of bloody things lar!

In the end, it makes me just loveeeeeeeeeee my friends coz only through years of sieving do I manage to find people whom I manage to not dislike.

I also dislike having this blog so popular then I cannot complain about people, which makes it really less interesting - BAH!

Don't care, I shall blog about these people!

Yesterday, I met someone who won't admit his mistakes, and geez, it just reminds me of middle-aged old men who will never say sorry even if they burned off all your hair by accident!

I don't think he reads my blog coz he is the cheena cheena type of guy who wears bell-bottoms to this era.

It's about mahjong again so people who don't understand mj can skip this whole chuck about him.

Now yesterday Russell bao-ed wan zi coz this fellow (let's call him Eric) kept feeding him wans until he got 9 outside.

It was pretty obvious Russell was ready to go for a happy wan zi win, but yet Eric still gave him another wan. So Russell won, and he bao lar! Everyone happy.

I looked at his damn cards, and you know what's inside?

All tongs outside, and maybe 7 and 9 tong, one DONG FENG, and one bloody yi tong.

OBVIOUSLY HE IS NOT SET YET RIGHT?!

So I asked why he doesn't wanna throw the damn dong feng first, you know what he said?

"BOH PIAN PLEASE, I AM ALSO VERY BIG!"

*Roll eyes*

Big my ass, got one dong feng inside if win only win 2 tai for half-colour right?!

If he said something like "I think it's better to throw now than later when he is more likely to be ready mah..." or something to that effect, I can still understand. I can even understand if he said that exact same sentence he said but with a sheepish smile.

But it is the WAY he said it such that he is SO DAMN CLEVER and his method of playing is OBVIOUSLY THE CORRECT WAY that I REALLY CANNOT TAKE LAR!

Yeah yeah so clever then kena bao-ed. I also always kena bao, but when people ask me why I always say I like to risk things, I don't act like "Boh pian, this is the way to play!". GAH!

Eric also gets pissed off everytime people win 1 tai, because the fellow likes to play minimal 3 tai win.

Mahjong is all about winning faster than others do, so excuse me if I win 1 tai to prevent your 5 tai win hor, then how, I don't win 1 tai to let you win limit is it?!

GAH! Mahjong really brings out the worst in people.

Which reminds me - I also don't like people who ask me not to blog about them, especially if they are so bloody mediocre and boring, why would I do that? Dullify my blog? Obnoxious!

Most of all I don't like people I don't like liking me.

You know sometimes it's like you meet say, Eric again, at a social function and he doesn't know you don't like him very much, so he sashays over to airkiss you, and you are forced to say a few sentences to him, because it is polite to be polite to people to are polite to you. Yes I know I used a lot of polites very politely.

So at the end of the function, Eric smiles at you, and says, "You know, I used to not like you coz you are so rude on your blog! But now, I think I like you lah, you are really quite a sweet girl!"

TAMADE!!!!!!

I HATE HATE HATE THAT coz all I wanna do is to tell Eric, Please just STOP liking me because I don't like you, and if you go around saying I am sweet and I go around saying you are a bitch, then everyone is gonna think I am a hypocrite! (Omg sweet, bitch and hypocrite rhymes! Accidental poet)

I just wanted to complain.

Woah!

Don't scare me leh, so many of you wanna go extend hair too?! Cannot lar, I cannot let so many people go extend, very spoil market one leh! If everyone also have the same thing, then I pay $200 for what?!

(Had 100 strands put in, $2 each)

Anyway, here are the pictures as promised:

Is way longer than it looks coz it is already curled up... Wanna know where my real hair ends? Armpit length, yes.

One more shot, acting pretty again... Yawn.

I'm very amazed by these people lar! They managed to find hair the EXACT SAME SHADE AS MY OWN, and even added in blonde highlights for me just like my real hair!

Nice right? Super bombshell!

Anyway, the price is $2 for one strand, and they told me that the hair they used is REAL HUMAN HAIR. The thing is, it really does feel like real hair, but if it is real hair, how can it be so cheap?

The only possibility is...
















IT IS SOME DEAD CHICK'S HAIR!

Must be lar! Morbid right, immediately die then shave off her hair, maybe wash it (or not...!) and dye it and pack into plastic bag to sell.

I call my dead chick Alicia, so yeah, this Alicia really has good hair quality! It is soft and silky, but I don't really dare to go smell it.

Kelvin conveniently told me the story of Korean movie The Wig, where a girl gets possessed by the wig of a dead chick whenever she wears it. I'm not possessed yet, but if I ever do, I think it will be great material for this blog! MUAHAHA!

Also told Mike to be careful not to sniff the hair, "Alicia" might be a guy! Hehe...

Anyway, I have stopped blogging for Stomp (I quit myself, you fools, not that I was kicked off), and replacing me is Jaymee Ong.

I hope she is interesting.

Actually, I don't see why Stomp needs their female bloggers to be so good looking. FOR WHAT? Also never upload pictures, if do, also irrelevant to the topic - best is get one ugly but damn funny chick (yeah la, can feel the typical boring insults going "That's why they got you!" but try harder la, your insult barely registers), pretty or not doesn't really break or make a blogger.

See Mrbrown, very handsome meh? Now is slim lar, but when he was chubby also everyone likes him mah, coz he funny!

Speaking of funny, my last blog entry there got erased!! Muahaha... Apparently, there are lots of prudes who read Stomp, and they demanded that I teach their kids bad stuff and therefore my entry must be taken down.

Wooo, cry me a river Singaporeans, you think if your kids have free access to the internet they don't have other bad stuff they can see? *roll eyes*

Besides, all I said was that once you have hit the legal age and you think you have 1) taken all protection necessary and 2) think you can handle it, then go ahead and have MORE SEX! (vs waiting till they are 18 and above or married)

Everyone pretends like they think sex is not great, but if that is true, where they all come from, drop from cranes ah?

Really cannot stand it when people give such typical advice to younger people. Study hard lar, don't smoke lar, don't drink lar, don't have sex lar, don't go into a relationship too young lar...

IF EVERYONE FOLLOWED THESE ADVICE THEN THE WORLD WOULD BE A FUCKING BORING PLACE CAN!

If Bill Gates studied hard maybe he won't be what he is today. Was Edison not even allowed to go to school or something? That's why he sold newspapers and burned down a train? (I remember from Primary school Chinese textbook!)

*roll eyes*

Ewww. Man, serious serious people really make me cringe so bad. Hate prudes.

Don't have sex before 18! Yeah, at 17 you cannot handle it, and miraculously, one day later after your birthday you can. Wow!

Lovin' my Locs - Onyxcherry

I had natural hair most of my life until I got a relaxer during my sophomore year in college. After going through the grow-perm-cut cycle two times I knew it was time to make a change. In December 2005 I made the decision to never relax my hair again. This blog is about my journey with Sisterlocks. I started this blog because when I was researching Sisterlocks reading the blogs of other women who had made the journey before me was an integral part of my decision making process. It is an honor to be on this exchange.

Back to blogging

Sorry lah guys, by tomorrow, the project I am currently working on will be finished, and so, I will be free to blog again!!!

That day, I went to dye my hair, and the guy kinda put on a stronger than usual dye - which totally fried my already dry hair... In a hissy fit, I snipped the crumply ends all off with a pair of damn scissors.

It was so depressingly short...... so I did hair extensions!!

Qihua was the one who found out about it first, and it LOOKS SO GOOD I TELL YOU!

Her hair used to be small curls and dark brown (a bit reddish too) and till her shoulder blades, now it is to her waist and totally looks damn Shakira k!

Good gracious me!

She told me to touch her hair, and it is REAL HAIR LAR! Real hair in the exact same colour, texture, and feel as her own!

Best of all: $280!

Affordable!!!!!!

I can't believe for the past 6 fucking years I have been GROWING AND GROWING my hair till it reaches my ass, and bloody hairstylists keep trimming the ends off coz of split ends. After 6 muthafucking years, it is only to my waist!

WHY BOTHER WITH GROWING HAIR, JUST EXTEND LAR!

Want hair like that? Just pay up! (Which I also suspect she did)

Now we mortals don't have to keep complaining about how even if we grew our hair it won't be as thick and as nice! Coz of hair extensions! Hurray!

Man, I keep finding more and more ways to make myself more fakely pretty.


Pictures tomorrow. It is super nice, like a princess. Which I am, of course. Totally. A bombshell princess.

SOMEBODY PASS ME THAT TIARA!